Kim Porter

Kim Porter was a goddess.

I was filled with sorrow for days after she passed. I felt a light had been turned off. She wasn’t an artist, but she was the source of inspiration for creators. She was the muse for Al B Sure’s “Forever My Lady”, Zoe Saldana’s ‘Drumline’ character was based off her relationship with Dallas Austin (Nick Cannon playing the latter) and Diddy’s soulmate, sharing three kids. So why did it hurt my heart so much?

A flashback.

Sitting on the floor between my mother’s legs, while she braids my hair. The news was broadcasting that Diddy had been dumped. Photo’s of a beautiful, statuesque, dark skin woman flashed across the screen. Coming home from a trip of some sort (business or pleasure), he was greeted by an empty house. Pregnant with their twins, she found out he’d been having an affair. Worse his mistress was also knocked up, with their lovechild due a month earlier. She ghosted him before ghosting was a term.

“That’s goodie for him. I would never fight over a man. There are too many men out there to stay with someone who treats you like that,” my mother commented.

Bingo. Besides being a great mom and a beloved socialite, Kim Porter was the example my mother used to teach me self-worth. Despite Diddy being famous, wealthy and sharing the next of kin, she walked away. In a world that conditions women to be submissive, she valued herself, refusing to settle. Kim Porter taught me to always have dignity.

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