Self-Love With Queen Ze

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but here you go. Prioritize yourself and everything else will fall into place. Life is too short to accept draining toxicity. Talk to yourself nice, treat yourself nice, fucking go for it. Fear and crippling self-doubt is no way to live. If it makes it easier, pick one as your mantra this week and act accordingly, especially if you’re sacred. Via: A Sophisticated Me

The Follow Through Matters

If the actions don’t match the benevolent intention leave. You shouldn’t tolerate mistreatment, because someone had the intent of being good to you. Actions speak louder than words, it’s the follow through that counts. Choose you. Is this fitting for someone in your life? Artist: Audrey Emmett

What Self Love Actually Is

Self love is essential. You’re happy with who you are until being bombarded with your imperfections, and other peoples criticisms. When it’s constructive take it, but there are toxic people who will use it to belittle you. For power, for control. Your self-love acts as a barrier of protection, for what’s acceptable treatment towards you and what’s not. Otherwise you’re pouring from an empty cup, to fulfill someone else’s needs.

Loving ones self is being preached from soap boxes, because few people possess this quality. One crucial to your physical and mental health. When I didn’t love myself I loathed being alone, I nit-picked everything about myself, I went out of my way to do for others who wouldn’t do for me. Accepting who I am made happiness a consistent state of being, removing a void I attempted to fill with substance abuse.

The biggest struggle was forgiving myself, especially for things that weren’t my fault and retraining negative thinking. Good things would happen for me, because I’m worthy of them. Which slice of the self-love pie do you need to work on this week? Via: Lyfchngr

Love Like Jackie Burkhart

Let your self-worth reach parity with Jackie Burkhart’s this weekend. What baby step can you take to come closer to self-love? What nouns (people, places or things) must you add or subtract from your life to get there? Via: Ninetieees

To Be Treated Right

Respect is a requirement.
Anyone who makes you feel bad for wanting to be treated properly isn’t someone who belongs in your life. Before a trip to Paris I allowed people I grew up with to mistreat me, feeling that years equated to undying loyalty. On multiple occasions I’ve given them the opportunity to prove they can change, but again they took my kindness for weakness and continued to exhibit poor behavior. If someone genuinely cares about you this won’t be a problem. If it is, have enough self-love to walk away.

No matter who the person is, they’re not entitled to degrade you for their empowerment. Not family. Not friends. Not employers, or co-workers. Not unscrupulous celebrities. I have every right to defend myself against those who’ve picked on me, antagonized me, been complicit, told lies about me, back racist to spite even though they profit off injustice (your karma will come), lied on me…I did NOTHING wrong, they did. I will give the same energy, showing no mercy. Are there people making you feel bad for asking to be treated properly? Artist: The Female Warhol

Co-Existing With Self

Easier said than done. Accepting yourself is hard to do, there are parts we repress or don’t address due to the pain it causes. Push through it. I can’t stress enough that we are all imperfect, that is the the definition of being human, we err. Stop comparing yourself to someone else, they lack things you have and vice versa. Which is why we need one another. Instead, focus on what you need to do to be greater than the old you (ten years ago, one year ago, a week ago, yesterday, this morning).

Right now I need to work on realistic time management, somewhere in my head I truly believe I can do one million things at once. The reality is I need to accept my limitations and focus on one thing at a time. Also my daily meditation has fallen by the wayside during this pandemic. Prior I meditated without fail every single day. At first I was angry that I hadn’t been as rigorous with my practice, but hey, we need to allow flexibility in all the things we do. Now I appreciate it more, making it a habit again solidifies how vital it is to my spiritual wellbeing. Meditation grounds me, making me more efficient.

What do you accept about yourself today and what are you working on? Start anywhere even if it’s a small baby baby step, any movement in the direction of your evolution counts. Maybe you want to reduce your meat intake and increase your veggies, maybe you want to journal once a week, maybe you want to walk 10,000 steps. It all matters. Via: 5am Girl

What Are You Celebrating?

The things I am grateful for this holiday season:

  • True Love: Following all the signs to false flame after false flame I almost gave up. True love is rare and something that should never be taken for granted, of course you couldn’t get there without the next item.
  • Self-Love: Not seeking validation that you’re worthy from somewhere else. You cannot find true love without it. This is a hard task, since you have to go through so much trauma acceptance and healing, but definitely worth it. In the end you will find happiness in each day. You accept that you are complete but still a work in progress and there is nothing wrong with that, you’re human, imperfect by definition.
  • Boundaries: I have some extremely toxic people in my family and I’ve had some in my social circle (which I will address in my next post), kicking them to the curb has only allowed for better things to come. I use to hold on for far too long, now I have no problem dropping people. People have no right to disrespect you and believe they are owed eternal chances. Smear your shit somewhere else.
  • God: Always. Blessings and miracles aplenty.
  • My Gifts: At first I found it a burden, mostly because I didn’t understand it. Now seeing how many people I am able to help and energy I’m able to balance I feel fortunate that god would use bestow such a blessing on me. What are five things you are grateful for and why?

Via: Melanin Me Podcast

Who You Are

Once upon a time, at least six other different species of humans roamed the Earth (i.e the Neanderthals, Hobbits, Denisovans…). All of them went extinct except for yours truly, us. A key factor in their demise was our race depleting their food supply when we migrated throughout the world. We are Homo Sapiens; our ability to work as a team to hunt and gather is how we’ve survived. Together we are quicker, faster, smarter. When I read this chapter in Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind I gave everyone on the subway the side eye, our ancestors were killers. Sidenote read Sapiens if you want more information on how we came to be.

It’s no wonder we are social creatures in constant need of companionship, we crave that tribal bond, it’s in our genetic coding. We need each other. Sometimes the need to belong leads to some low places with low vibrating people. It brings out a lesser version of you just to feel the validation of fitting it. Look around you. Look at your social circle. Significant other. Coworkers. Family members who might be toxic. Do you love who you are when you’re with them? Are you dimming your light to fit in? Dumbing yourself down? Behaving poorly?

Don’t be a low quality version of yourself to be in the in crowd, love yourself and you’ll attract a better tribe. You are the energy you put out, raise your vibration and your standards. The universe will match it with people who make you feel good. Photo: Were Not Really Strangers