Fairytales, like all parables, teach us truths through hyperbole. The story of Rumpelstiltskin taught me two lessons that saved me from Mick Jagger: the power of names (read Revelation 1: Mick Jagger Is Satan) and the taking of firstborns.
I didn’t realize how much I talked to him about The Real Housewives, especially Salt Lake City, until sifting through our conversations. Originally I was looking for the screenshot I DMed Andy Cohen, prioritizing watching The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, over touring with The Rolling Stones.
I told Mick, real name Michael Philip Jagger (fucking posers), that I could not traverse the world with him due to a conflict of interest. A reality television connoisseur I knew, knew, from that trailer this was unhinged television. Must see in real time type shit. To which he responded he needed me. Thus I formulated a plan, sacrificing my true desire by watching the series on my laptop. Leading me to send a message to Andy Cohen, informing him of my dilemma. This is where I’m at and I need you to meet me halfway, by uploading those episodes ASAP!
It didn’t stop there. I mentioned the franchise profusely: two thumbs up, Jen Shah’s arrest, the seasons over, what am I gonna do after the reunion? You made me miss an episode, something about a bridal party.
Can you imagine? Just spewing nonsense to the biggest rockstar in the world. He couldn’t give two shits. I was straight out of the movie Mean Girls. When Cady Heron can’t for the life of her, stop talking about Regina George. Not only that, once he made me miss an episode I wouldn’t allow him to speak to me while the show aired. Next thing I know, he was using Raggedy Anne, aka Melanie Hamrick, to gather the souls of clout chasers (read Sutton Stracke Is A Neo-Nazi). He also used the second half of the Ratty Patty sisters (read Rolling Stones Women De-Evolution), Sally Wood (read White Supremacist Crystal Minkoff). Two basic white busted bitches, who only look mildly attractive standing next to old men. Where’s the lie? If you bitches don’t know your place…you couldn’t even stand next to me and be noticed.
Energy spreads, that’s why I told you to disconnect from the Devil’s collections (the Kardashian Jenner West & Raggedy Anne). Since infiltrating he’s almost killed Vicki Gunvalson and the following firstborns: Jack Barlow, Bobbi Rose & Robert Cosby Jr. Medical emergencies, drug addiction. All to spite me. I stand ten toes down on my decision to factor them in.
Ultimately I didn’t tour with him, because he intentionally ruined Sara Tam’s wedding. Taking $5000 from me, telling me to pick him up at the airport, only to inform me he’s not coming when I got there. Telling me to figure out how I’m gonna make it, after saying he’ll handle everything for weeks, causing me to miss her walk down the aisle. After that I DUMPED his ass, that’s when the abuse ramped up. He tortured the shit out of me, almost killed me, got people to help him too. I documented EVERYTHING. I’m from the Upper East Side, I don’t play that shit. I live for revenge. Thanks for the added evidence, you got got. Xoxo Athena. Via: The Hollywood Reporter & WhatsApp Updated:12/3/2024 5:31am
